What is Your Pain?

The purpose of this post is to be completely and utterly honest with myself about the relevant events in my life leading up to this revelation. I am scared. I am a woman of a certain age and I am in my junior year of undergraduate school. I am desperately hoping to get accepted into the business program at my school and be on track to graduate when I anticipated. My journey started as everyone else’s straight out of high school, with some minor obstacles that set me back a few semesters. Overcoming that, I worked my fingers to the bone to do the best that I was capable of doing and sometimes having to accept that my best was just not good enough, I continued pushing through hoping to see the light at the end of the tunnel. And I did.  I applied to continue my education and got accepted into my first choice university. I graduated with my associate’s degree and secured a management position at global luxury retail establishment weeks before I moved 150 miles away from home. Now here is the scary part, I still have credit card debt from working super part time while finishing my degree, other sky-high expenses and I am back in the same boat even as a manager. During this time, it’s not difficult to feel as though I will never be able to progress to where I want to be. The fear of continuing the cycle of living paycheck to paycheck and not be able to invest in the things that I enjoy, such as vacations and delicious cuisines torments me. But! Each instance that these thoughts creep into my mind, I remind myself…I receive my bachelor’s degree in a year and a half! I am an expert at interviews and I am a GIRL BOSS™. I have never allowed myself to be in a situation where I could not get shit done, even if I was left half dead. Sure it is nerve-wracking to be a full-time student with two jobs trying to have a healthy work/life balance. Especially while taking two of the most difficult classes at the same time as the last resort in hopes of getting accepted into the program of your choice. But I did it last spring semester! So why should of this spring semester any different? Sure I’ll have late next nights, copious amount of cry sessions, and probably lose even more weight. But, getting that feeling I got when I received my cap and gown last May when I actually receive my acceptance email this May, will make it all worth it!

Which brings me to this…

With impeccable time management, meditation, therapy and self-care, you will work things out. If you like face masks, pamper yourself! Yoga? Find a free class. After that buckle down, write down your goals, get a calendar and make a weekly to-do list! Set an alarm for a month from now to remind your self to pick your head up, because you are on your way!

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